I unexpectedly (and reluctantly) moved back to my hometown. I unexpectedly fell for an old high school classmate, and he unexpectedly proposed to me. We unexpectedly found out I was pregnant, and we got married sooner than expected. Now, we're experiencing the unexpected daily...the good, the bad, the funny, the frustrating. Read all about it...

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Pregnancy Round Two!!

What if you have a child less than a year old, and then find out that a pregnancy test has a plus sign yet again?!

I think having an unplanned second child is bittersweet, specifically when you're not yet financially sound and just got the gist of taking care of one baby.

Oh, and by the way, I'm not pregnant again. However, I know a lot of people who are pregnant for a second time, whether unplanned or not, and pretty much all of their firstborns are two years old or younger. All I can say is: God bless them!

My husband and I really need to get back on our own before we can have another mouth to feed. If our situation is better in three to four years than it is now, we'll discuss having a second baby then. That way, we have time to really decide on having a second child, and to be more prepared financially and mentally if we do choose to go for round two. That's the glory of being young...we've got time!

Another big reason is because we cannot fathom the idea of having an infant or toddler plus a newborn! I admire everyone who has kids less than two years apart in age. It's double the energy, double the sleep deprivation, double the diapers...possibly double the breastfeeding? Spending is doubled, especially as they get older when cars and college come into play.

It is also divided care and divided attention. By having two kids, one naturally feels less loved, and it's often the older child. How do parents of two very young kids deal with jealousy? How do they make sure that both of the children feel equal in their parents' eyes? 

On the brighter side...

It's double the love, double the laughter, double the memories. You have a second chance at caring for a newborn, and you get to experience the feelings of being like a new parent all over again. Your firstborn has the opportunity to be a big brother or sister, which could make them feel special and important. You would have two kids who could grow up to potentially be best friends, or at least value the importance of family and relying on each other through thick and thin.

You can see how I am on the fence about having another kid. It is mainly because at this moment, I am not at all ready to be pregnant again. I am still fighting to shake off this baby weight; I don't need to add on any more pounds! I am enjoying being a mother to one adorable infant and spoiling him (in a healthy way) with all of my love and attention without having to worry about another baby feeling deprived. Oh yeah, and our parents would definitely kill us.

Not everyone plans to have a child, let alone more than one. I cannot imagine being ill-prepared a second time. If it is God's plan for us to have another child, we can only hope that we are in a better place than where we are now.

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